"Of course! I'll make friends in no time! I always do!", I chirped while I did several mental happy dances. I was euphoric!
Life was good. Until the day before the first day of college, when the question the professor had asked came back to me. And that is when the paranoia set in. I have always been good with making friends. But here, I was being thrust into a completely new situation. One where everyone knew everybody else and I knew nobody. New to college, straight into the second year can be a scary thought. More so when friends have already been made, groups have already been formed and teachers and students know each other personally. I was scared.
I set out from home for the first day lectures with a heavy heart, wanting nothing more than to enter a class full of familiar and smiling faces. But what I got when I did enter my new class, were sixty odd pairs of eyeballs upon me wondering who the new girl was. I sat down at this empty bench, growing more and more aware of the unfamiliarity of the place and the people. I probably had my lucky stars smiling down at me right then, for the people I chose to sit with were extremely friendly, and did their best to make me feel comfortable (God bless them! :D).
Days rolled into weeks, and now, two weeks later, I don't feel like an outsider anymore. I do not wonder who to sit with in the canteen after lectures, for I know I will find people asking me to sit with them. I no longer dread the breaks between the lectures, for I know I will find people to spend time with. Staying back at college, helping with Polaris (or at least trying to!), albeit grudgingly was the best decision I've made. Working together on papier mache joker heads and shopping at Crawford for colourful cloth definitely served a deeper purpose. It helped me get over first impressions and also got people to look at me beyond my 'new girl' tag.
Two weeks into college, it doesn't seem like such a dreary place anymore. While I've made some friends, there still are a lot of people I've never spoken to. Hell, I'm not even friends with most of the class on Facebook!
Two weeks into college, I've now begun to let down my defensive cover and let people know me. I have stopped being anti-social and realised it is okay to be surrounded by people very unlike me. I just have to try and understand them and like them for who they are.
Two weeks into college, there are a lot more smiles, a lot more laughter and a lot less frowns. I know I still have a long way to go, but college is a lot better, while I still try to 'fit in'.. :)
P.S. - Lots of love to the people who went out of their way to help me fit in. You guys know who you are. Thank you so much. =)
